Scoorge McDuck and Holidays of the Past

I’ve been through enough therapy to know that Holidays should be a fucking shit show for me. I mean it’s a popular trope that if you’ve lost someone your a mess around the holidays. Seth Rogan even made a movie about it. Ironically it came out the year my mom was diagnosed with cancer. I

Dead Parent Jokes Explained

I make a lot of Dead Parents jokes. Probably what some would consider an inappropriate amount. If there is an opportunity to make one, or reference the fact that I don’t have family in a funny way, then I’m gonna take it. At a job, shortly after my mom died, my manager mentioned our company’s

The Ever-Changing Nature of Grief

As I work through things I’m constantly surprised at what brings me comfort and what triggers me. It’s never what I expect and it changes constantly. When I was first diagnosed with depression, almost 14 years ago, I had to figure out what would trigger an episode and what my signs where. I then had

Dead Parents and A Ton of Baggage

A lot of my grief is tied to the idea that I wasted time. Maybe I shouldn’t have moved to Atlanta for a year, or Austin for two. I could’ve spent that first year and half in LA at home with my parents. Those handful of evenings when my mom was sick I spend on

Push Away The Unimaginable

If you spent anytime with my mom and I between June 2016 and September 2018 then you know we listened to Hamilton almost everyday. I discovered it first and told her she had to listen to it. She laughed, clearly thinking another History that she’ll encourage but never fully understand. Jokes on her, she became

Perception Is Not Reality

I’ve always been fascinated with how editing can change a photography. It changes the tone and intention. My mother use to always tell me that my perception is not everyone else’s reality. It was her way of telling me to be mindful of those around me. We edit ourselves to be okay, to look like

The Effect of Time

I have a weird relationship with photography. I think it was what I was meant to do but my father spent most of the my childhood and teenage years discouraging me from doing it. It wasn’t because he didn’t approve of that. He was a photographer. A successful one. He just didn’t like competition, and

Why doesn’t this day get easier?

I keep expecting Father’s Day to feel normal but looking back, since losing my dad this day just gets stranger.

Homesick In June

About every other day I think about packing up my entire apartment and moving back home. This isn’t a new feeling. I’ve written about it on here countless times. Does the current pandemic make it feel like I should be home with my family even more then before. Yes. None of this is helped by

The Power of Food And a Really Good Peach Pie

My mother taught me early on the power of food. The amount of times I’ve written about food on this blog should be a blue as to how important it is to me. Sunday nights, growing up, everyone one came over to our house. New people came in through the front door waving to my